80+ Funny Communication Quotes
Funny communication quotes bring out the humorous side of our human connections. Within this collection, we’ve gathered more than 80+ amusing quotes that highlight the funny moments when we communicate, misunderstand, and even laugh at our own slip-ups.
You’ll find witty one-liners and hilarious observations that are sure to bring a smile to your face, all celebrating the comical aspects of human interaction.
Funny Quotes About Communication
#1
. “Sometimes I think the key to good communication is just knowing when to shut up.”
#2
“The tongue is the only instrument that gets sharper with use.” ~ Washington Irving
#3
“The single biggest problem in communication is the illusion that it has taken place.” ~ George Bernard Shaw
#4
“When the eyes say one thing, and the tongue another, a practiced man relies on the language of the first.“
#5
“I’m not great at advice, but I can give you sarcasm and funny memes.”
#6
“Communication: the art of interrupting each other at the same time.”
#7
“If you don’t understand my silence, you will not understand my words.” ~ Elie Wiesel
#8
“Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak out and remove all doubt.” ~ Abraham Lincoln
#9
“Most conversations are simply monologues delivered in the presence of a witness.”
#10
“My communication skills are just as impressive as my ability to finish a whole pizza.”
#11
“Talking is overrated. I prefer to communicate through interpretive dance.”
#12
“The biggest communication problem is we do not listen to understand. We listen to reply.” ~ Stephen R. Covey
#13
“The art of conversation lies in listening.” ~ Malcolm Forbes
#14
“Nothing is so simple that it cannot be misunderstood.“
#15
“I’m fluent in three languages: English, Sarcasm, and Emoji.”
#16
“If you can’t say something nice, send a sarcastic email instead.”
#17
“Effective communication is 20% what you know and 80% how you feel about what you know.” ~ Jim Rohn
#18
“Don’t knock the weather; nine-tenths of the people couldn’t start a conversation if it didn’t change once in a while.“
#19
“I communicate best with dogs. They always understand my barks of laughter.”
#20
“The secret to clear communication is repeating yourself 37 times.”
#21
“We have two ears and one mouth, so we should listen more than we say.” ~ Zeno of Citium
#22
“Words are a wonderful form of communication, but they will never replace kisses and punches.“
#23
“When in doubt, overuse the laughing emoji—it covers all awkward situations.”
#24
“I don’t need a personal assistant, I just need someone who can translate my thoughts into coherent sentences.”
#25
“I speak two languages, Body and English.” ~ Mae West
#26
“When all other means of communication fail, try words.“
#27
“If I had a dollar for every time I misunderstood a message, I’d be rich in confusion.”
#28
“Silence is golden. Unless you have a toddler, then silence is suspicious.”
#29
“The trouble with talking too fast is you may say something you haven’t thought of yet.” ~ Ann Landers
#30
“Good communication is as stimulating as black coffee, and just as hard to sleep after.”
#31
“I’m not ignoring you; I’m just prioritizing my snacks over texts.”
#32
“Communication tip: Make sure your sarcasm font is on point.”
#33
“The more elaborate our means of communication, the less we communicate.” ~ Joseph Priestley
#35
“The Internet is the most important single development in the history of human communication since the invention of call waiting.“
#36
“Communicating before coffee is like trying to swim without water.”
#37
“Communication: the fine art of trying to say the same thing three different ways without losing your mind.”
#38
“The difference between the right word and the almost right word is the difference between lightning and a lightning bug.” ~ Mark Twain
#39
“I slept for four years. I didn’t study much of anything. I majored in something called communication arts.“
#40
“I speak fluent song lyrics, but only in the shower.”
#41
“Emails: because yelling ‘I NEED THIS NOW!’ across the office is frowned upon.”
#42
“The 3 fastest means of communication: telephone, television and tell a woman.“
#43
“I’d respond faster, but I’m busy laughing at my own jokes.”
#44
“The best way to communicate with a teenager is through song lyrics.”
#45
“A good speech should be like a woman’s skirt: long enough to cover the subject and short enough to create interest.” ~ Winston Churchill
#46
“I communicate best with animals. They never judge my weird voices and sound effects.”
#47
“The art of conversation is knowing when to hit ‘send’ or run away.”
#48
“Communication: it’s best to pretend people are actually listening to you.”
#49
“Communication tip: Use emojis to avoid any sort of actual emotional expression.”
#50
“Communicating with toddlers is like talking to tiny, drunk people.”
#51
“I’m sorry you find communicating so difficult, next time I’ll read your mind.”
#52
“If sarcasm burned calories, I’d be a supermodel.”
#53
“My email inbox is a black hole where messages go to be forgotten.”
#54
“I love the sound you make when you shut up.”
#55
“If you want to know how many chins you have, take a selfie while talking on the phone.”
#56
“I communicate with my dog through a series of treat negotiations.”
#57
“Romeo and Juliet is another example of why communication within a relationship is so crucial.”
#58
“The difference between texting and calling is like the difference between driving a car and riding a unicycle blindfolded.”
#59
“My email signature should just say ‘Sent from my bed, half-asleep’.”
#60
“Communication breakdown: when your brain farts and your mouth says something completely unrelated.”
#61
“I’m fluent in body language, especially when it comes to eye-rolling.”
#62
“I speak fluent sarcasm. It’s my second language.”
#63
“I’m not great at expressing emotions, but I excel at sending GIFs.”
#64
“If the internet were down, I’d probably forget how to communicate entirely.”
#65
“If brains could be charged like phones, I’d probably never run out of battery.”
#66
“I need a ‘like’ button for real-life conversations.”
#67
“Communicating with toddlers is like trying to decipher a secret code that changes every day.”
#68
“I’m a professional ghoster — I communicate by disappearing.”
#69
“I communicate best through memes. It saves me from using actual words and emotions.”
#70
“I don’t always reply to messages, but when I do, it’s usually a week later.”
Funny Quotes Communication
#71
“I’m fluent in silence. It’s the universal language of introverts.”
#72
“If I had a dollar for every time I misread a text, I’d have my own private island.”
#73
“Communication: the fine art of avoiding saying what you really mean.”
#74
“I’m not ignoring you; I’m just pretending to be busy so I can avoid socializing.”
#75
“If loving you is wrong, then scrolling through your social media is totally right.”
#76
“When someone says ‘literally,’ you know they’re probably not being literal.”
#77
“The key to a successful relationship: mastering the art of passive-aggressive note writing.”
#78
“Trying to explain social media to older generations is like teaching a dog to do calculus.”
#79
“Cats communicate with their eyes. If only we could understand their disdain for us.”
#80
“FaceTime: when you can’t decide if you want to be seen or just heard.”
#81
“Phone calls: the modern equivalent of a surprise colonoscopy.”
#82
“I talk to myself because sometimes I need expert advice.”
#83
“I’ve mastered the art of selective hearing. It’s a gift, really.”
#84
“I am so good at communication, sometimes I don’t even need to say anything.”
In a world filled with text messages, conversations, and funny moments, these funny communication quotes have got your back. They show us that even when we mess up our words or misunderstand each other, there’s always room for laughter.
So, next time you share a good laugh with a friend over a goofy chat or a silly mix-up, remember these quotes. They remind us that communication isn’t just about words; it’s also about the funny moments that bring us closer together.
Keep sharing the joy and humor of these quotes with your friends and family to keep the laughter flowing in your conversations.
